"Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives. I rather believe that time is a companion who goes with us on the journey and reminds us to cherish every moment, because it will never come again. What we leave behind is not as important as how we've lived."
-Jean Luc Picard

Friday, September 4, 2009

Gagstastic emails part XII- Department of Health/ Swine Flu update

If you receive an email from the Department of Health telling you not to eat canned pork because of swine flu.............




Ignore it.




It's just Spam.



*sighs* Just like this stupid email.





This is important information, please pass along to everyone!


It is too bad that the government is making this out to be more than it should but there are some symptoms that you should be aware of.




See the caution below.



Scary! If you wake up looking like this,





don't go to work or school, my gosh, don't go anywhere!


We hope you recover and soon.


*sighs deeply*


I know I've said it before, but I really don't get the point of 99.9% of forwarded emails. They are either:


1) Just plain stupid or mildly amusing at best.



2)
Sparkly and filled with fake sentiment in an attempt to make the recipient feel guilty about not being absolutely delighted to receive the horrid thing.



3) Idiotic urban legends and or outright lies about whatever group, product, individual, etc... you currently dislike or have been instructed to dislike by the various people or institutions in your life. These emails can usually be disproved in a matter of minutes by the average ten year old with an internet connection.


Forwarding ridiculous emails as a way to "keep in touch" is like taking an old birthday card you received, scratching out the name of the original sender and writing in your own, cramming it inside a envelope that is too small, and then not putting enough postage on the envelope so the new recipient has to pay the mail carrier to receive it. As my late grandmother would say, it's beyond tacky!


Sincerely,


Hairball T. Hairball

2 comments:

Rosie Hawthorne said...

Wha??? Wait a minute. The email told me to forward it to everybody in my address book and a miracle would happen to me at 2:37AM.
That's still gonna happen. Right?

Lidian said...

At least chain letters could be torn up and thrown away, which was satisfying. (Well, worrying too, sort of, but I like tearing up junk mail - alas spam does not tear up nicely!)